Things He'll Never Know
by Sakate
Summary: Quick one shot of the scene in the last episode of the second season, where Jimmy stops off at Tom's flat to speak with Julia. When Tom accidentally lets it slip that he was sleeping with Kyle, what happens after Jimmy leaves? Musings on a possible conversation between the two partners that bridges some unfilled gaps from the show.


Author's note: don't own Smash or any of it's lovely characters, etc.

This is a quick one-shot, another missing in-between scene where you watch it and are kind of left wondering what went on afterwards...so I wrote out what I thought might have happened! This takes place during the scene in the last episode of the series where Jimmy stops off at Tom's flat to talk to Julia, and Tom lets it slip that he and Kyle had been sleeping together before he died. Mostly dialogue between Julia and Tom explaining what she missed while they were fighting. Especially since they kind of go from big fighting to suddenly being friendly at the Tonys...anyways, hope you all enjoy (if you don't, no flamers please) and comments/constructive critiques are always welcome - none of my work is beta-ed (I don't really have a bunch of followers, hahaha, so probably not too necessary); I usually just give it the glance over as I write the author's note then hit submit. 

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Tom comes back from the kitchen with two mugs in hand after seeing Jimmy leave. Julia turns to look at him and he clears his throat, handing her the tea and setting his own down as he sits back on the piano bench. "Just say it." he says looking up at her, lifting his hands up in a gesture of resignation.

"You slept with Kyle." she said, as much a question as a statement.

"Right after opening." he admitted, nodding.

Her eyebrows raised so high they threatened to disappear into her hairline. "Opening night? Of Bombshell?"

He looked at her, then huffed, looking away then back again to face Julia's mother-like look, partially accusatory and partially befuddled at having completely missed this until now.

"You and I had just fought over Gatsby after I lost City of Angels...you walked out...and even though I mended some of the wrongs with Sam and Ivy, I wasn't anything more to them than their director. So yeah. I was lonely. Then Kyle walked by..."

Julia sighs. "So he stayed over that night."

"Well...not just that night. He...we..." Tom looks down, emotions from that horrible morning bubbling back up to the surface. Julia sits down on the bench beside him, and he shuffles over to give her room, sniffling before he takes a deep breath and continues.

"I didn't know, not until after he died...he had a boyfriend." Tom finally let out. "I'm not sure why he never told me, but for half a week, he'd come over after our shows got done, and...then one night, he never showed up." He looks up at the ceiling with a pained chuckle. "I was so embaressed. I thought that he had probably just done it in the moment and wasn't really interested...and I tried...tried to call him, the next morning..."

It dawned on Julia now, that though she had heard Derek mention who had notified them, it hadn't occurred to her then during the chaos why it was Tom of all people who had been the first to find out about Kyle's tragic accident. How that must have felt. "Oh Tom..." She murmured, shifting her mug to one hand and wrapping an arm around him as he'd done for her the night of their anniversary. He leaned against her, sniffling and glassy eyed, revealing the truth that he had kept quiet for weeks, not wanting to let anything mar Kyle's memory. Far more than she had even done for Kyle.

They sat there for a few moments, taking comfort in each others presence as memories of that day filled both their minds.

Tom sniffles again, then shakes his head and lets out a deep breath. "I'll never know if he was really interested...It was only a few nights, and apparently he'd been dating one of the tech crew from Hit List for a month. I think it was exclusive from what I've heard since, but now I'll never find out...it's stupid." He laughs bitterly. "He was fifteen years younger than me, I don't know what I was thinking. He never would have actually wanted me. Maybe I'm turning into Derek..."

Julia shook her head at his words. Tom may be some things, had sabotaged relationships with things he had said or done, but his intentions had always been sincere and well-meaning.

"You heard what Jimmy said. Whatever..." She paused, gathering her thoughts before continuing. "Whatever Kyle did, his actions, not telling you he was already seeing someone...he was interested in you, and really liked you. You're nothing like Derek - he would have had nothing to gain from sleeping with you..."

Tom looked at her, eyebrows raised and a humorous look of faked shock on his face at the way her words came out. She chuckled. "You know what I mean." She catches his hands and holds it with her own. "If he confided in Jimmy that he liked you, then trust that he meant the things he said."

Tom sighed, face relaxing as he nodded in acceptance. "I know. I just wish..."

"We all wish it. Broadway lost a rising star that day."

He hummed in agreement. "Jimmy and Kyle...when I first met them, the really did remind me of us, long long ago." Tom looks at Julia with another humorous look, and they both chuckle. "Well, Jimmy's the composer, but he reminds me more of you and Derek than of me..." Tom admits. "...he's a firey one. Do you think he'll be alright? He walked out looking rather conflicted - he barely said goodbye."

She sighed. "I hope so. For both of them."

Tom pats her hand, and looks at her, tilting his head and raising an eyebrow. "Well then." He says airily. "It's going to be a big night, shall we finish getting ready for the ball milady?"

She smiles, feeling content for the first time since Bombshell had come back from Boston. Things felt normal...and she would enjoy it for as long as it lasted.

"Let's do this."


End file.
